Moon Two- Acceptance
Second moon is often when women realize there is a new life within. We piece together the connection between what comes from ourselves and what comes from another, the joining together of two into one, and the acceptance our body offers the emplanting of the embryo. I am not sure our bodies’ physical reactions are completely out of the realm of consciousness, although I certainly don’t feel so “connected” to myself at a primal level to be aware of it ocurring as some claim to be. What I am very aware of is my emotional reaction and personal acceptance of bringing a new life into this world. With each pregnancy, this felt a bit different. Some were met with joy, others felt unsettling due to timing.
I believe “everything happens for a reason” and life offers the lessons- gifts- I need to help me be who I am destined to be. I am not just a physical being having a spiritual experience while on this earth, but rather, a spiritual being having an earthly experience. For me, whether or not I am going to accept this new life is not a question- I unequivocally will. But it is still sometimes a process, a journey, an undertaking- to mirror that open, welcoming womb in my attitude and heart of hearts. I understand others do not share my beliefs and may view a new life as a choice, and I respect their freedom to believe what they believe. I believe in choice too- but I view myself as having made the choice already, before I began my journey into this life, and by signing on to slide down the rainbow bridge, I chose to accept whatever I was offered, as a gift, yes- even the difficult things- not with an attitude of complacency or resignednes, but with a willingness to make the best of all things- to, when I contract from those difficult experiences, as the earth- create diamonds from coal. In my personal experience, I always create more pain and suffering for myself by not coming to a place of acceptance and willingness to make all things beautiful with integrity, love and openness. I would never try to force someone else to adopt my viewpoint, but I offer it as a possibility… one that has added richness to my life.
As I meditate on acceptance, I imagine myself softening, expanding, and becoming a sanctuary. I think back to the vision I had at the beginning of this pregnancy and the golden beam of light streaming down from the heavens and descending into me. I go back to that image often, feeling the dazzle and warmth of that beam again, feeling it descending into me and becoming one with me. Perhaps this is a good time to ask for a vision, a phrase, or a promise to hold onto and center with.
As morning sickness or physical discomfort may appear, see if you can get a copy of the article “Morning Wellness” by Patrick Houser from the magazine Pathways to Family Wellness (I can’t find a link online). In this article, the author chronicles how his wife transformed “morning sickness” into “morning wellness” by journalling through her turbulent emotions. If you have chosen to accept a pregnancy, but are having a difficult time emotionally or physically as you embrace new life, write or say the words “I am completely at peace with this pregnancy and its timing”- and see what conflicting thoughts or ideas rise up in response. Take each one seriously, working through the dissonance to find the beauty and harmony of accepting what Life offers, in your own gracious way- and allowing yourself the to have conflicting feelings, observing them with objectivity. Sometimes the best way to come to a place of inner peace is as simple as switching from the subjective state of feeling your conflicting feelings, to the objective state of noticing them, validating their existence, and “being with them” without judgement. Once the emotional reaction dissipates, it can be much easier to make a decision to dwell on and continue to host only the thoughts and feelings that will be helpful. For instance, when a fear surfaces about whether the baby will be healthy, I notice it, then consciously decide not to worry about the health of my baby- rather, I use feelings of worry or thoughts of potential problems as a reminder to take my prenatals or do something positive for myself and the baby, all the while sending blessings and good vibes to the two of us.
Acceptance can take two paths. It can lead to apathy, resignedness, inaction- a victim mentality that this just happened to me. Or, it can spur us on towards making the very best of the circumstances and opportunities we face as we take hold of life as active participants who help determine the final outcome. I find myself constantly engaged in choosing the positive model of acceptance during a pregnancy, because this is a time when social and environmental problems tend to bother me more than any other time. What kind of world am I bringing a new human being into? One that desperately needs people who care about it to stand up and help transform it. One that needs people to “”accept the challenge”. And with this current pregnancy, more than any other, I have a sense of this soul’s insistence on taking part in Life and coming for a reason… I’ve been reminded of the words in Esther 4:14- “And who knows whether you have not come to the kingdom for such a time as this?”
And I begin teaching this incarnating person how to accept Life with graciousness and positivity, by doing so myself now.